Question: How many Republic presidential candidates from 2000 did it take to screw in a light bulb ?

Answer: It doesn't matter whether the bulb is changed or not; it only matters that the new bulb was made in the US of A. Taiwan and South Korea have put up massive barriers to importing US light bulbs; we'll see how they like it when their bulbs cost $10,000 to screw in here.

At a conference, three scientists - an American, a German, and an Indonesian -
were talking among themselves and bragging about the technological advances their respective countries have achieved in the field of medicine.

Says the American: 'In Washington,
there was a baby boy born without arms,
so we attached artificial arms on him.
Now that he's grown, he has become an Olympic professional boxer and a gold medallist at that.'

Then the German countered: 'That's nothing to hat we have done.
Back in Berlin, there was a baby girl born without legs,
so we attached a pair of artificial legs on her.
Now she is a three-time marathon gold medallist in the Olympics.'

The Indonesian interjects: 'Is that all you have - just gold medallists?
In Pare-Pare, South Sulawesi,
we had a baby boy born without a head.
We attached a coconut and he is now the president of the Indonesia.'